You cannot control other people’s emotions, but you can control your own.
Hurtful confrontations often leave us feeling drained and confused. When someone attacks us emotionally, we may wonder what we did to rouse their anger, and we take their actions personally. We may ask ourselves what we could have done to compel them to behave or speak that way toward us.
It’s important to remember that there are no real targets in an emotional attack and that it is usually a way for the attacker to redirect their uncomfortable feelings away from themselves. When people are overcome by strong emotions, like hurt or anguish, they may see themselves as victims and lash out at others as a means of protection or to make themselves feel better.
You may be able to shield yourself from an emotional attack by not taking the behavior personally. First, however, it is good to cultivate a state of detachment that can provide you with some protection from the person who is attacking you. This will allow you to feel compassion for this person and remember that their behavior isn’t as much about you as it is about their need to vent their emotions.
If you have difficulty remaining unaffected by someone’s behavior, take a moment to breathe deeply and remind yourself that you didn’t do anything wrong, and you aren’t responsible for people’s feelings. If you can see that this person is indirectly expressing a need to you—whether they are reaching out for help or wanting to be heard—you may be able to diffuse the attack by getting them to talk about what is really bothering them.
You cannot control other people’s emotions, but you can control your own. If you sense yourself responding to their negativity, try not to let yourself. Keep your heart open to them, and they may let go of their defensiveness and yield to your compassion and openness.
SGC Admin: They say that a change is as good as a rest… Yep, that’s true… although sometimes after traveling a rest is sorely needed… :) just to recharge the batteries after flying, walking, watching and sight-seeing… :)
Hubby and I were fortunate to visit Jolly ole’ England this past May and the high peaks of the Adirondacks in July… Each vacation bringing its own unique set of memories to add to the Vacation Journal… :) Today we share some photo’s of our England Trip… :) along with links to the interesting fun places we visited.
Links:
Ludlow,Shropshire UK . An absolutely lovely old town/village. Explore the local shops, lots of charity shops, along with an old-fashioned sweet shop, various butcher shops, book shops, grocery shop, places to eat and rest. This place has tons of history and goes back hundreds of years… check out the “black and whites” the old Tudor buildings still in use today… There is a local market that takes place 3 times a week… Check the days, but think they maybe, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays…
Ludlow Castle A fabulous example of how castle’s were built, there are changes to architecture as it changed hands through the years.. it was left to go to ruin until it was bought and saved… There is a nice little gift shop (purchase your tickets to the castle here) and somewhere to have tea and cakes, (we didn’t get to that this time around)
St. Bartholomew Chapel, Richards Castle, Herefordshire, UKA very old Chapel located close to the ruins of Richards Castle, (not to be missed, let your imagination play). This Chapel is still used a rare occasions. A must see, it’s in fabulous condition.
Richards Castle Inn, Richards Castle… the local pub, stop by for Kath’s Sunday Lunch… :) Pub is open in the evenings…
The RoebuckBrimfield, Ludlow.. Serving Full Sunday Lunch…a local with a store attached
The Church Inn, Ludlow This place has some fun items on the menu.. along with beer (of course), cider and more
The Boot Inn Orleton(Annual Beer Festival July 24 to July 26 2015) Perfect Village Local
Iron Bridge ShropshireThe First Iron Bridge in the world… An influence on the Industrial revolution
Blists Hill Victorian Town don’t forget to check out the local pub for an fashioned sing along, and the chips are a real treat. Featured on t.v.
For the London part of our trip, we purchased the 3 day London Pass and found it was economical for our needs. We rented a flat for 3 nights, and still didn’t have a enough time to do all that was included in the pass. Transit is expensive but it is the recommended way of getting around London… No money is used so you need to purchase an oyster pass… (there may be other pass’s but we didn’t explore them this visit and encourage you to do some research to find the best deal for your budget and needs) We haven’t included our photo’s of Windsor Castle, which can be reached via the tube, then rail train leaving from Waterloo Station.. if traveling in a group it might work out cheaper by getting a group pass… (4 people and up?). When you reach Windsor Castle you will be required to go through a security check (like at the airport), certain items will not be allowed through the security check. Windsor Castle and the town of Windsor are fabulous…
The period of completion, rather than being just an act of finality, is also one of transition.
Life is a collage of beginnings and endings that run together like still-wet paint. Yet before we can begin any new phase in life, we must sometimes first achieve closure to the current stage we are in. That’s because many of life’s experiences call for closure. Often, we cannot see the significance of an event or importance of a lesson until we have reached closure. Or, we may have completed a certain phase in life or path of learning and want to honor that ending. It is this sense of completion that frees us to open the door to new beginnings. Closure serves to tie up or sever loose ends, quiets the mind even when questions have been left unanswered, signifies the end of an experience, and acknowledges that a change has taken place.
The period of completion, rather than being just an act of finality, is also one of transition. When we seek closure, what we really want is an understanding of what has happened and an opportunity to derive what lessons we can from an experience. Without closure, there is no resolution and we are left to grieve, relive old memories to the point of frustration, or remain forever connected to people from our past. A sense of completion regarding a situation may also result when we accept that we have done our best. If you can’t officially achieve closure with someone, you can create completion by participating in a closure ritual. Write a farewell letter to that person and then burn your note during a ceremony. This ritual allows you to consciously honor and appreciate what has taken place between you and release the experience so you can move forward.
Closure can help you let go of feelings of anger or uncertainty regarding your past even as you honor your experience – whether good or bad – as a necessary step on your life’s path. Closure allows you to emotionally lay to rest issues and feelings that may be weighing down your spirit. When you create closure, you affirm that you have done what was needed, are wiser because of your experience, and are ready for whatever life wants to bring you next.
whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you.
Your destiny may be waiting for you, but whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you. There are those of us who believe that our lives are predestined and that we should resign ourselves to our lots in life. Yet the truth is that it is up to each one of us to decide what that destiny will be. While each of us is born with a life purpose, it is up to us whether or not we will say yes to fulfilling it. And just like when we choose what to eat, who to keep company with, and whether to turn right or left when we leave our home everyday, choosing to say yes to your destiny is a decision that can only be realized when you take action to make that choice a reality.
Whether you believe it is your destiny to be a parent, an adventurer, an artist, a pioneer, or a spiritual guru, saying yes to your destiny is only the first step. While manifesting your destiny starts with knowing what you want and believing you can attain your goals, there are then the actions that must be taken and the decisions to be made before your destiny can truly happen. When you take responsibility for fulfilling your destiny and begin acting with the intention of doing so, you not only take fate into your own hands, but also you become the hands of your own fate. Doorways inevitably open for you to step through, and every choice you make can be a creative act toward realizing your goals and dreams. You begin to follow your instincts and intuition, recognize opportunities when they are presented to you, and seize those golden moments. You also begin to recognize the decisions that may not serve this greater picture and can more easily push them aside.
Remembering that the decision to fulfill your destiny is always a choice can be empowering. Knowing you are fulfilling your destiny because you want to, rather than because you have to, can make a huge difference. When you are freed from obligation, obstacles in your way become challenges to be overcome, and the journey becomes an adventure rather than the obligatory steps you are being forced to take. Your destiny may be waiting for you, but whether or not you meet your destiny is up to you. Your fate is in your hands.
A personal outdoor sanctuary is an important part of feeling connected to all of life.
Each of us has been blessed with an innate need to celebrate and glorify life. At a most basic level, we honor the forces that came together to bring us into being by caring for our bodies and our souls. To truly rejoice in existence, we must also learn to cultivate loveliness in those special places that replenish the soul. When we create a garden sanctuary, we are reminded that we are a part of both nature’s essence and something more. An outdoor retreat is a place we can surround ourselves in nature, beauty, and the life force. It is not difficult to create a sanctuary—we should endeavor, however, to create sanctuaries that speak to us as individuals.
Whether we have a yard, a grassy corner, a patio, or a porch at our disposal, our creative potential is infinite. Any of these spaces can become a magnificent garden. When we feel drawn to specific themes such as Zen, angels, paradise, or the ethereal, we should explore them. Décor and furniture crafted from natural materials like wood and stone blend seamlessly into nature. Yet we can also augment the natural world by filling our garden sanctuaries with statues, bells or gongs, or colorful flags. Running water, like that in a created stream or fountain, helps energy flow smoothly. If space is a concern, crystals and mirrors can fulfill the same function. Hidden features like concealed swings and reflecting pools veiled in shadow can surprise and delight. As your garden sanctuary evolves, remember to invite the elemental spirits of nature to assist you in your efforts to create a small pocket of harmony, beauty, and peace in your own backyard. If you have not already felt their presence, sit quietly in your garden and reach out to them. You will feel these earthly guides at your side as you continue to develop your sanctuary.
In the refuge of brilliant color, sweet scents, and stillness you create in your garden, the burdens imposed upon you by a sometimes hectic world will melt away. The splendor and tranquility of what you have brought into being will entrance you, allowing you to forget the constraints of time and space. No matter how large or small your garden sanctuary, the time you spend reveling in its pleasures will refresh your spirit and provide you with innumerable opportunities to celebrate life.
Serenity's Gift Cove (sgc) 